LeLou's Angels

It was a lazy summer afternoon in late August 2019.  We had family visiting from out of state and were spending the afternoon playing card games, eating popsicles, laughing, and having fun.

My phone rang.  It was my Aunt Leslie.  I stepped outside and answered the phone. 

She was heartbroken and crying as she let me know about my cousins and the loss of their sweet baby, Bodil.  She was full term and perfect.  

I sat outside and cried.  I cried as I assembled the things for their bereavement kit.  I hate giving these to people, especially MY people.  My heart was broken for them.

Lydia and Kellen were now members of this horrific "club."  This is the club that no one wants to belong to.  The price of admission is too much--it's sending your sweet baby back into the arms of our Heavenly Father and finding a way to keep breathing afterward.  While this club is one no one ever wants to join, it is a club that is inclusive and full of love and empathy.  This is where I have found the most healing and the most closure.  

For Bodil's first "Heavenly Birthday," Lydia joined our ranks and assembled kits to donate to their hospital in Bodil's honor.  She refused to let us help.  I so badly wanted to help her.  It was inspiring to see her determination.  She has been helping us at The Lilly Pad Project ever since.  

This year, Lilly would have been thirteen.  I have always tried to do something to honor her each year for her birthday.  Grief is a fickle thing, and you never know when it's going to rear its ugly head and knock you flat on your back.  That's what happened this year.  It felt like I was losing Lilly all over again.  

To honor her, I encouraged everyone to be still and be present with their people--love them, cherish them, and be in that moment with them.

I also asked all of the people who have been my greatest supporters with The Lilly Pad Project to meet me at a local restaurant and we did something crazy--we ordered dessert first!  We had so many that "celebrated" Lilly with us in spirit--they had dessert first wherever they were.  We laughed, we cried, and I was overwhelmed at the love and support I have in my life and what an impact Lilly, who never took a breath, has had on us.  It was touching.

Later that night, Lydia and Bodil were on my mind.  Bodil has brought so much into this world.  Bodil has brought so much love, compassion and healing to other mamas who have lost their babies.  Bodil has done this through the service of her wonderful mother, Lydia.  

Then it hit me--I absolutely knew what Lilly wanted for her birthday--she wanted Bodil honored, too.

Lilly and Bodil have too many sweet little angel cousins in Heaven.  We do what we can to help the families of angel babies.  Our volunteers are all angels.  We knew we had to have "Angels" in our new name.  We mashed up Lilly and Bodil's names and came up with "LeLou's Angels."

We are so excited about this new adventure.  I am grateful to our sweet babies for bringing us together!  I mean, I guess Kellen did that when he married Lydia, but whatever.  ;)  Bodil and Lilly did the rest!